demariana | Personal Thoughts and Musings

There are some LJ users that I read and would love to get to know better. I have even added some as friends. Others I go to friends of friends to read. Now I know alot of time there is more going on because of reading about a locked post in another person's journal. Or going to someone's memories list and trying to read a poem and finding out I am not allowed to read it. That is kinda annoying that it is listed if it is not for the public. I wonder why they get listed, but that is getting alittle off track. I have at times commented on some of the posts. Just trying to be friendly, but worried that I am just coming across as a dork. I wonder at times what people who dont know me RL have seen in what I have written to make then want to read. I know that what I write here is for myself, but sometimes I just want to know what people find interesting about my life. How did I make the cut as a friend? Why havent I made the cut? I know I at times want to email and ask why someone dropped me as a friend, or what caught their eye to add me? Now these thoughts dont consume me or affect what I post. It isnt something I dwell on. They are just fleeting thoughts that wander in and out. So why am I making this post? I just felt a need. I wonder if I offended someone by a comment I made. I know I get foot in mouth disease even online. :) Now, I do like making friends here. This to me is another VR medium to make friends, and learn about people. I have used IRC,and furrymuck in the same way. ICQ is for people I already know from other places because it is more 'real'. ICQ to me is a way to get to know someone better. It is more personal than the character someone plays on IRC or furrymuck. I wish I could find others that interested me. I would love to find a couple more communities that were around interests I have, and would care to learn more about. Sometimes it isnt easy finding others. *sighs* I read about some of the LJ drama that has happened, that is happening and wonder would I care to be in that drama? Would that make me feel different or special, or attacked. I wish I could write a program to search by multiple interests. I have also thought about emailing people that I have dropped to let them know why. Or why I havent added someone. I feel that if I want to know it, others might.
Ok, now I am rambling, and not actually sure what I am meaning to say. Just going round in circles. Goodnight, sleep tight dont let the bed bugs bite.