(no subject)

I can not seem to sleep tonight. Phaeton and I went out to see The Day after Tomorrow at the dollar theater for the 9:20 showing. We got home about 11:30 and into bed about midnight. I have been waking up almost every hour since. I have been edgy and paranoid most of the day and I think it is affecting my sleeping. There is no reason for the feelings. At times I just want to curl up. My hands keep clenching into fists at times. They will not stay still. The one thing that calms me is petting one of the cats. Melodie has been beside me or sleeping on my pillow most of the night. I swear he knows and is trying to help. Dreams have been weird but not remembered for the short time I have been able to sleep tonight.

Ok, time to try and sleep again.

Today

The uneasiness is fading. This is a very good thing. I need to realize that when I start to get like this it might be because I need some alone time. It was not till the rest of random left that I started to feel the tension leave. It then dawned on me about how long it has been since I have had some alone time in the house. I am sure it is about 2 weeks. (note to the rest of RAnDoM, when I start to get antsy just ask if I need some alone time) Hopefully I will be able to recognize this sooner and be able to ask for what I need.

Phaeton and Caritas went out to bowl and have some time together after they dropped off Jeshua at work. I tossed on some work out clothing and started to Dance Dance Revolution. I did the 15 minute order we have set up and then my 30 minute order of non-stop songs for a nice solid 45 minutes. I downed a bottle of water and decided to try out some other things while people were gone so I could look like a fool in peace. I do the non-stop song programs on beginner level. My knees can not handle the jumps so I also have only songs that have 1 or at most 2 jumps in them on my order. It gets my heart rate up and feels really good. I love the fast songs I have on my program. What I did was went into workout mode, but setting my goal of time instead of a program. I then went and picked songs that I knew from beginner level and tried them on light. Most of course were harder. There was one that was exactly the same. I then tried it on standard and it got harder. I should have taken notes. I might move one or 2 songs on my program up to light or speed them up to increase my workout.

Another thing I am thinking about adding is weight work. There are machines at work and I could make up a routine on them. I would try to do it on my lunch. Maybe split days so I do 15 minutes each day. I know I need to do something to start building muscle.

Now that I have pin pointed most if not all of my anxiety my day has gotten a lot better. I need to go and feed the cats and then maybe a nice shower and/or nap.