Yesterday

I was spacey and out of sorts most of the day. Shaky and needing to do things but not sure what to do. Caritas and I did get to Kroger's and purchased some stuff to try and go lower carbs. I am only trying to stay under 100grams/day. I was actually doing pretty well most of the day with it as well. I was at my goal at about 10:00 and then something snapped and I went and got the cookies I made the other day day and had about 6-8 of them as well as a glass of milk. *shakes head* Got to love stress.

The positive things about yesterday. I didnt have to work. We went to the Y and worked out. I was able to handle 30 minutes on the elliptical trainer. We got some books from the library. We got some good ideas and food at Kroger. We made hard boiled eggs. :) I drank lots of water.

The bad things. I have gained back 10lbs. I blew my carbohydrate goal. I was tired and shaky alot of the day.

I took a nap from 7:30-9pm and Jeshua was kind enough to get Phaeton from work. I ate the cookies and then went to bed at about 10:45. I did not sleep well at all. I woke up multiple times and my back is hurting right now. *sighs* At least the guys came to bed and the cats snuggled at times.

Now I must get ready for work. *yawns* I hate my hours today. *sighs*

ugh

It is raining and I am edgy. Yelling more at drivers. Feels almost like I do when it is close to my time of the month, but that isnt for 2 weeks. Defeatist attitude. Very very annoyed at everything. We got a package that is addressed to a totally different street. Nearly bit off the head of the guy when I called the post office about it. It is a very STUPID IDIOTIC mistake. I didnt need to be so bitchy though. Almost want to open the thing. I wish I knew what the problem was.

Maybe a nap would help.

Better

It helps when I can
a) get a nap
b) identify most or all that is causing my jitters

The nap was great. Sere came up and snuggled close. She laid on my chest as I snoozed. I didnt feel groggy when I got up and I had the time to get to the Bank before picking up Caritas from her job.

I am feeling fear and almost paralyzing terror. The new year and new year's resolutions. The chance again at leaving my job. Worried about Caritas and her dad. There are other things I am just not going to go into as well. Maybe later. Some I just cant even pin point yet.